my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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