actually, I'm a sock model
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
