So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Randomize
