Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I looked at my own cervix.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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