how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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