the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
