i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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