Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
