STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Will exercising make me less horny?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
