D3 body, D1 cock
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
