first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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