...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
is that a dick in a sweater?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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