I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize