she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
