you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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