Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
