we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I cut my penus on the lid.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
i came on her dog
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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