i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
