I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
