dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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