Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
