I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
We were destined to go to rehab together
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
