I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize