So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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