Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
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