Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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