look no pants
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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