i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
