Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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