i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
