what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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