Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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