Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
