Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
