no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
