I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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