if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
