seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
