White coat. Heels.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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