Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Randomize
