We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Randomize
