Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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