you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
