I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Randomize
