Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
