I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
