I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
false alarm. still invincible.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
