is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
