it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Me too!
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
