Heybabeimwearingurpanties
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
