Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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